Thursday, March 13, 2008

Ask Terrible Gardener

Dear TG
I have succeeded beyond my wildest dreams with lettuce this year. My lettuce is so big that I can sit in my Adirondack chair in the cool shade of a lettuce leaf. My question is, how did this happen?
Concerned Gardener

Dear CG,
Your mutant lettuce probably resulted from a combination of global warming, too much water, and possibly something involving divine retribution for rampant overuse of Miracle Grow. I suggest you avoid planting Beefsteak tomatoes and stick with cherry tomatoes. If the same conditions prevail, the cherry tomatoes should be just about the right size to enjoy in a giant salad.
TG

5 comments:

GardenJoy4Me said...

This is a HOOT ! Thanks for the laughs !
Joy .. still giggling

Crafty Gardener said...

Love your humour.

kate said...

Wherever did you get such a wonderful chair like that?

Hey, if I got lettuce like that - I'd be enjoying salads for days.

Katarina i Kullavik said...

Oh, I enjoyed that! So funny!
/Katarina (Roses and stuff)

greeny said...

Oh, funny! My kind of humor.
I think if there was lettuce like that at my disposal, I'd be heading to the nearest farmer's market to set up shop. We could use a bit more home grown lettuce around here.